Hmmm, is there such a thing as 20's angst?
2003-02-25 at 3:50 p.m.

 

Isn't it odd that sometimes routine is comforting and sometimes it's the thing that drives me more crazy than anything else.

Eighteen months ago when I was just reemployed on a contract after being made redundant and my step-daughter was pregnant and Mr Me's job was hanging in the balance all I wanted was routine. Now I have something like that. A safe, permanent job, the family has settled down, Mr Me's job is less under threat. And I'm bored.

Do you all see the inconsistency there? Well, heck. What can I do? I want a worthwhile job and while I know that whinging about that here isn't going to bring it crashing down on my head, I still can't get up the enthusiasm to go out and get it.

I feel like I'm using up the precious time I have in a vague discontented haze. That can't be constructive. But I haven't got the drive to do anything about it.

I suspect I'm not addressing the real issues here, but for once I'm not brave enough to walk into that hellhole.

I don't know where Mr Me and I are going. Apparently we're getting married, but we don't seem to be able to plan to get that done either. Apparently we're going to buy a house. Nope, can't afford that, so we wait in limbo to see if the house prices fall.

I need to address all my home issues before I really consider my work ones.

I'm 24 and treading water.

Sometimes I feel it's because my partner and all my friends are 15 or so years older than me. They've made all these choices and are settling into their lives. I have few people to talk to about these feelings of frustration.

Am I having a quarter-life crisis? Does anyone want to make me a life plan?